77NRIoR9x-g.srt

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And then of course,
by the time the child is old enough to 

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be launched out into the social world,
then all the constraints that are 

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associated with the playground are 
immediately placed on that child.

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And that's a very unforgiving landscape,
right?

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Because the last thing a child wants 
really the last thing that child wants 

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is not to have any friends or even 
perhaps equally seriously not to have a 

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best friend.
Huh?

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Not read something so idiotic the other 
day that I couldn't believe it.

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So the newest prince,
so Queen Elizabeth's,

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I guess great grandchild is off to 
daycare and in the UK and in this 

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daycare,
they don't let the kids have best 

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friends because that's unfair.
I thought no

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something times you see something that's
so stupid you can't even believe it.

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It,
it,

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it exists.
And that was one of those examples 

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because it's been known for quite a long
time,

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that one of the developmental milestones
that children attain somewhere between 

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say the age of five and 10 is they pick 
a best friend.

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And so they.
And,

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and you know the hypothesis well that's 
unfair to all the other children.

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It's like,
well,

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first of all,
you can't be the best friend to everyone

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because you then maybe there is a 
billion children,

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so each of them gets one second.
It's like that's just not a very deep 

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relationship,
so the idea that you can be equally 

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friendly with everyone is so 
preposterous,

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but even worse.
The thing is the thing that the child is

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doing is actually becoming.
They're stepping out of their 

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egocentricity because they're best 
friends becomes more important than they

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are,
and that's a precursor for adult 

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relationships where you know if you're 
married,

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while your partner should be at least as
important as you are,

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and the relationship should be more 
important.

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But then when you have children,
it's like they're more important than 

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you that that's that.
It's unless there's something wrong with

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you,
you come second in.

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Your children come first and they're way
first.

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They're not just a little.
I mean you're necessary because without 

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you,
they're not going to manage,

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so you have to take care of yourself,
but you're not number one anymore.

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Once you have kids and less seriously,
unless you didn't learn the lessons in 

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the playground and when you have a best 
friend,

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you're not number one.
They are and so,

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so anyways,
there are these constraints that emerge 

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in the.
In the social landscape,

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you have to have friends and also you 
have to single someone out as 

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particularly unique among those friends 
and establish a genuinely reciprocal and

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caring relationship.
I can't remember the psychiatrist who 

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studied this so intently.
Unfortunately,

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he was the first person to to do a 
detailed analysis of the best friend 

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relationships that children established.
It's,

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I'd like to give him credit for his 
ideas,

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but unfortunately I can't remember his 
name,

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so.
Okay.